Tuesday, September 6, 2011

a big day.

Today is a big day. 

Four months ago, as a brand new college graduate, I only had inklings of what my life would be like now. I knew I'd be going to grad school, but I had no idea what it would actually feel like to take such a big academic step. I knew I'd be starting a new job, but I had no idea how woefully unprepared I'd feel to be starting it. I knew I'd be moving to a new apartment, but I had no idea where or when or any of those important details.

Dress: Kohls, Fall 11; Sandals: Target, Summer 10

But today, I start them all. First day of grad school. First day at my new job. Moving into my new apartment. My first apartment not in my college town, but in the town that I'll be establishing myself as an adult and could possibly be spending the majority of my adult life in. Needless to say, it's all a bit overwhelming.


In a good way, though. I won't say I haven't had a few emotional meltdowns (the tears, I have them in excess.), but overall, I'm ready to move on, ready to turn a new leaf and move from my comfort zone to being a bit uncomfortable in my day-to-day for a while. A few weeks ago, right after I signed the lease to my new apartment, I had a particularly rough night, tossing and turning and wondering if I'd done the right thing. And then I remembered reading a quote that said:

If you're not doing something every day that scares you, you're doing something wrong.

And I realize that I've spent a lot of time doing things wrong, staying in my comfort zone and being afraid of being a little uncomfortable. So lately, I've been trying to step out of the box a bit more. Planning a rather lofty trip abroad, adding a few scary-big things to my life list. And you know what-- I've re-learned (as I always do) that a little discomfort isn't as scary as it seems, it's exhilarating. 

 

So off I go, doing things that scare me a bit, and being glad that I'm making the decisions to do them now, rather than finding myself a few years down the road asking why I didn't just try. It's something I have to constantly practice, trying to step one extra toe out of my comfort zone each day, but so far, so good :)



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